The hottest trend fueling psychology circles right now is the revival of the Enneagram, nine personality categories that help you better understand yourself and others. I am a #Seven, the consummate Enthusiast, who possesses an insatiable zeal for life. We Sevens yearn for one big, fat adventure after another. If we didn’t have to rest, we wouldn’t, and that is precisely why Osaka’s non-stop action packed Dotonburi district, which dates to the 17th century, was made for me.
The Squishy Vibe
Located along a lively canal flanked by high-rise billboards, the pedestrian-only shopping, eating, and entertainment zone never seems to run short on the unusual and bizarre of every ilk. To get the most out of a day or night there, be prepared to squeeze your way through a maddening herd of people. It’s so jam packed that traffic guards hold up signs above their heads with printed arrows signaling to stay to the left. Don’t expect an apology when someone shoves you in this school of sardines. It’s nothing personal. Just think of yourself as an emperor penguin inching closer to the center of the huddle.
Despite all the pushing, the area is totally safe with no seedy characters or sketchy areas. I brought my eighty-year-old mom here, and she was more than happy to stay out later. But if you’re slightly claustrophobic or fear the word “stampede,” steer clear of this district at nighttime. It’s much easier to take during the day. Think of the Vegas strip or Times Square on steroids.
Neon and More Neon
Come dusk the zone is literally electrified. Neon billboards and jumbo video screens illuminate restaurants and some sections are so bright you’d swear it was day. On several evenings I wandered around here and found myself thinking about how much the electricity bill must be. Not only is the lighting what I’d call high-octane but there are also herculean 3-D characters, symbols, animals and food making up the signage. You can see these on every visitor’s Instagram feed.
A mechanized crab at one seafood restaurant has pinchers that open and close. A ramen joint features a fierce, toothy green dragon jutting out over the doorway. Another enterprise sports the looming angry face of a Japanese chef. Coupled with all the lights and mammoth-sized images vying for your attention are blaring Japanese pop tunes emanating from all the stores and eateries.
The Eats
Just as dynamic and thrilling as the eye candy are the only-in-Osaka foods to try such as takoyaki, known as octopus balls, and okonomiyaki, thick omelets topped with shaved bonito flakes that seem to sway and come alive on the fry table.
Food hawkers line the main drag and its many alleyways shouting to stop and try. Walking while munching is an art form here. These fast-food chefs are not only cooking on the spot but also performing for the crowds raising their arms then chop, chop, chop or flailing chopsticks mid-air.
Vendors offer dessert treats such as melon pan, a sweet bun filled with vanilla, strawberry or green tea soft serve ice cream. Others roast chestnuts and sweet potatoes from homemade carts. A profusion of restaurants offer ramen, both cheap and costly sushi and the famous blowfish (yes, poisonous if not prepared properly). There’s also a sukiyaki hot pot with animal innards (an acquired taste), Kobe beef of every grade and kitsu-kashi deep fried foods on a stick.
Offbeat Adventures
Thrill-seekers will find Japanese arcades featuring the popular Japanese taiko drum game where one player is pitted against another to drum as fast as possible within a certain amount of time. You can also plunk money down to manipulate one of the “claw” machines to dig for a plushie Pokémon of your choice. Or insert a 100-yen coin (about $1) to purchase a tiny plastic item from what looks like a gum ball machine with all types of little toys and miniature trinkets crafted in painstaking detail. Yes, adults collect them, too.
When it comes to having fun, anything goes. At a multi-level arcade play retro video games on one floor, shoot pool on the level above or play pachinko on the next. You can also cast a line and fish for live fish for 30 minutes, then take a photo with your catch before tossing it back.
If you want to get away from it all, rent time at the 24-hour Multimedia Center to have access to your own computer, television cubby, or nap room. Watch your favorite old movies or soap operas or view your favorite YouTube video. You can even take a shower and order bar food if you have the munchies.
Everyone knows that Japan is “karaoke central” and that’s no exception in Dotonburi where there are dedicated facilities with tricked out rooms featuring grand TV screens, performance stages and microphones for crooning. Let loose your inner Justin Bieber or Katy Perry. No one will notice.
What, Puppies?
For animal lovers, the district offers what are called pet cafes. Up three steep floors is the Mamashiba Dog Cafe where you can reserve 30 minutes with the popular Japanese Shiba puppies. This was an unexpected and unusual treat for our family. You sit in a circle on a linoleum floor in a group of about 15 others. When it’s time for your session, about six to ten little Shibas wearing bandanas come bounding out. You cannot hold them but must let them come to you on their terms. Then you’re allowed to pet them lightly.
Doggie toys are strewn about so you can try to play fetch or tug of war. Sadly, during our time slot the pups ran only to the attendants. They did a few tricks with them then encouraged the little guys to play with us, but it seemed they were happiest running around in crazy circles.
Water, Sky and Capsules
Into boat rides? Purchase a ticket to board one on the Dotonburi canal and in a short 20 minutes, you can learn a lot more about this eclectic district. Take a photo in front of the iconic Glico Man billboard, the signature Osaka photo backdrop. Be a kid again and wave to all the spectators who routinely wave back. The canal walkway is yet another aspect of the area that is an experience in itself.
Wait, there’s more … a Ferris wheel! Riders hop on and off an unusual oblong wheel from the top level of a department store. Up to four people sit in a kind of giant glass hamster cage. The ride lasts about ten minutes and enables you to see the city rooftops from an unorthodox perspective.
When you’ve had enough of all the adventures there are clothing boutiques, souvenir stores, candy shops, and all manner of retail outlets to burn through your Yen at a breakneck pace.
If you yearn to be closer to all the action think about taking advantage of a capsule hotel where you sleep in an individual pod about the size of a camping tent for less than $20 a night. The trendy-seeming wooden box with a clear glass window at the front, a mattress, and a flat-screen TV feels almost cage-like, folks. But these human cubbies, stacked one on top of the other, are wildly popular with travelers on a budget. Think indoor camping with communal bathrooms.-Yes, even your hotel becomes another cool adventure to feed your experiential cravings.
Are you a Seven like me? Dotonburi is a luscious cheesecake for your pursuits. My advice? Take it one step at a time.